Gratitude Exercise

Gratitude Exercise
(or what I call the good, the bad and the ugly)

My desk happens to be under the stairs of my little studio. My yogis practice
yoga above me and pause at the cubbies outside of the yoga room to put their
shoes back on and gather their things. They talk to each other up there,
unaware of my presence. I can’t help but listen and am always amazed by the
things that come up after their yoga practice.

A ways back, I was sitting below and got to overhear one yogi talking
passionately about how mean her mother was growing up. Her voice was
bitter and hurt. You see, her mother criticized her for her entire life. Her
mother told her that she was skinny, clumsy and lazy. This yogi has tried her
entire life to please her mother, but all she gets in return is her mother’s
disapproval. She hears in her head her mother telling her how selfish she is.
Because of that voice, she feels selfish and doesn’t take time to nourish herself.
Even her yoga practice makes her feel guilty.

She went on further to say that the day she found out she was having a baby
she swore to God she would never treat her kids the way she was treated.
Instead, she makes a practice of telling her children that they are beautiful and
kind. When they break things, she’s quick to tell them, “it’s okay, it was just a
thing.” She’s quick with hugs and laughter.

I thought to myself how lucky she was to grow up with such a mean mom. I
wondered at what kind of work her children would eventually do and how they
would serve the planet knowing how special they are. I wondered at the life
her mother must have led to be so bitter and resentful. I felt sorry for my yogi
and for her mother. I prayed that my yogi could forgive her mother and see
the underlying blessing of the hidden gift her mother had given her. Her
mother had given her the power to be a beautiful mom.

We have all been given hidden gifts through our suffering. The process of
realizing the hidden gift ends the suffering. The following exercise called “The
Good, The Bad and the Ugly” will allow you to unearth the hidden treasures
not only in the less happy things that you have experienced, but also in the
happy things. This exercise will take some time. Plan to work on it in bits and
pieces. You may become very emotional during this exercise. Allow the
emotions to come up, acknowledge them and release them. Ponder and
journal your thoughts.

Take a piece of paper and fold it into 3 equal sections. In the first section,
write “The Good”, in the second write “The Bad” and in the third write “The
Ugly”.

“The Good”
Write down 3 wonderful milestones in your life. These are things that are really
big deals…things that you are immensely proud of.

Examples:

1. I bought my first car with money made babysitting.
2. I put myself through college.
3. I paid cash for my home.

“The Bad”
Write down 3 not so wonderful milestones in your life that were the result of
other people or outside situations. These are things that changed the course of
your life and you are not too happy about them still.

Examples:

1. My dad left my family when I was a child and I never saw him again.
2. My mother abused alcohol and was mean to me.
3. I was fired from my job.

“The Ugly”
Write down 3 things you have personally done in your life that you still feel
shame, disappointment and grief over. Be honest and know that this exercise
is landfill when you are done.

Examples:

1. I lied to......and it caused.....
2. I cheated on my wife.
3. I have credit card debt and am not meeting my saving goals.

Now, for each item, either just think about or better yet, journal the situation.
For example, who motivated you to get the babysitting job to buy your first
car? Why didn’t your parents buy your first car? What values do you have
today because of this accomplishment? That’s the good, and that’s pretty
easy.

For the bad and the ugly, you need to journal around why the situation
happened not just to you but to others involved.

• Who were the people involved.
• Why did they allow the situation to happen?
• What were they/you going through at the time?
• What were your thoughts?
• Walk in the other person’s shoes.
• What did you learn?
• How did it change you or them?
• What was positive that came out of it?

In doing this, you will find compassion and forgiveness of the person, the
situation and yourself. You will also realize that each of these life events happened for a reason. You did learn a lesson from them and you did grow in some way. Every single
thing that has ever happened to you is perfect because it got you to where you
are today and today is perfect. When you can look at the good, the bad and
the ugly as a gift and be grateful, the suffering around the situation ends.

We had a birthday!

Elemental OM turned 2 this month. We missed our big bday celebration due to some unforeseen events in my life that had me running back and forth to California. For EOM's birthday, I'm giving him (he's a boy in case you couldn't tell) an energy cleaning from a healer. To support his detox, I'm asking that all the yogis bring in written prayers, poems, crystals, flowers or other items to offer up in gratitude to our little guy and to Lebanon. The healer is going to work on the community in Lebanon as well.

According to the healer, Route 42 is giving us (Lebanon) a lot of trouble. We should all be potting extra plants in our homes. Fill your home with the scent of lavendar, sandalwood or jasmine. If you love crystals, he had the following advice:

"Place a crystal outside your door and ask it to take in all the negativity and transmute it. Place another small crystal outside your door, you can program it with the thought "inside these doors is a wonderful, healing space" or words to that effect and ask the crystal to emanate that vibration -- actually all of your crystals should be programmed to emanate a high vibration of healing love, your life will improve. Hey, it's worth a try, right? The emanation crystal should be placed on the side of the door that opens into your home and the negative vibe crystal should be on the other side."

In general, I think we should all be having wonderful and positive thoughts for Lebanon. The studio is still doing well. We are down from last year which is a little sad and frustrating, but I know the economy is bad. I've added a FREE class every week for the last few weeks and will continue to do so. Even if you can't budget in yoga, I'd like you to come and take advantage of that opportunity. Also, if you ever want to be a "check" in person or practice yoga in trade, we can work something out. Also know that you can always call me and I will help you in any way that I can. If you can't afford yoga and need it (and you do), please tell me and let that be my gift to you. It always works out in the end.

I want to remind all of you that the studio is a community. I know we tend to think of it as a business, but its really just a sanctuary for you. We do depend on you to keep our doors open and the toilet paper refilled when it runs out....

Do give a big hug to our instructors. You guys are spoiled rotten and don't even realize it!

Happy bday baby boy! We love you.

CLICK HERE FOR ELEMENTAL OM's ASTROLOGY CHART...super cute

Words of the Dalai Lama..."F@#k it, I'm going to Canada"

I had the honor of going to see the Dalai Lama yesterday in Oxford thanks to one of my amazing yogis. What a cool dude! He wore his saffron robe and sat on a couch in easy pose after methodically untying his shoes and taking them off while the crowd of thousands looked on in total amusement. He spoke simply from his heart with no plan.

Background
The current Dalai Lama is the 14th Dalai Lama. The legend is that each Dalai Lama is the incarnation of Buddha and is known as "the living Buddha". All of the Dalai Lama's predecessors have been men, but he has mentioned that the next incarnation could be female. I like that thought. The Dalai Lama is not only a religious leader to Tibet and all of Buddhism, he is also a political leader of Tibet. The current Dalai Lama has been living in exile from China since around 1960. He was forced to flee for his life during the Tibetan Uprising of 1959. That's when the Communist government of China cracked down on Tibet killing thousands of monks and driving them out of their homeland. Can you imagine?

What did he say?
I sat amongst many college students txting about drunk girls (I peeped over his shoulder) and talking party plans for the evening. (no judgment, I went to college too). Couple that with my own ears inability to follow an accent and I only picked up on 1/2 of the speech. For me it was more about soaking up his energy anyway.

This is what I heard:
Be your true nature. Your true nature is gentle, kind and compassionate. We gossip and talk about violence because violence is actually an aberration. Even in a large city, you can count on your fingers the number of violent deaths. That's because most every single human on the planet is actually quite kind and peaceful. That is our true nature.

Respect each other. Your religious traditions are wonderful and you should honor them. Embrace it. Live it. Respect the religious traditions of others. We are all saying the exact same thing and it is beautiful.

Do not judge a religion by extremists who are using religion to manipulate power and money. (and don't think it is limited to Islam extremists misinterpreting Jihad...pretty sure Christianity had a dark age). Religion is good. Traditions are good. Power and money as motivators...not good.

Finally, the Dalai Lama said, "Either you (Americans) get it or not. If not, "F@#k it, I'm going to Canada". At that point he laughed and so did I. That was probably the thing he said that moved me the most. You see, I get all the other stuff. I say it to you guys all the time...so nothing new there.

F#$k it...how wonderfully liberating. Sometimes I sound like (I hope to just myself) "blah blah blah blah...are these people hearing me...blah blah blah...." We have been open for 2 years now and classes should be 10 to 15 people deep. They aren't. (In fact, I've been getting up at 6 am every Saturday for the past year to teach 3 people...thank you 3!) I wonder if the location in Lebanon is the issue or if something else is going on. We have awesome facilities, good pricing, amazing teachers, a good schedule with variety and a really good message. Still, I can't get you guys to commit. It's very discouraging. I wonder how I have failed to fill up that cute little studio? Do we lack community? Is our message of self-help, self-healing and peace not sound? Is anybody listening? Seriously, you have 6 dedicated instructors at EOM who have dedicated a huge chunk of their experience to helping you.

In between questions to the Dalai Lama, floods of people streamed out of the building. To be fair, he was hard to understand. But, my God, it was so rude. Here is the living Buddha sitting before us and people were getting up and leaving in between his words. Late for a party? Avoiding the jam in the parking lot? Bored? If the reincarnation of the Buddha can't hold an audience captive, why would I be able to?

F@#k it. Either come or don't. My message is the same. There's always Canada.

I'll see the 3 of you on Saturday!

What is "enlightenment"

Speaking to my Immersion Participants the other night, I found myself lost in a profound moment of realization; Enlightenment is totally and absolutely obtainable for every single person sitting in front of me. In fact, Enlightenment is not only obtainable, but....OMG...they have all experienced it already and just don't know it! I HAVE EXPERIENCED IT TOOOOO!!

This realization has come after years and years of questing for some amazing Kundalini experience of divine bliss and union with Spirit. Years of meditation, workshops, yoga, gem therapy, reiki, acupuncture, hypnotherapy, regression and yes there was even that tantric shamanic water journey where everyone but me got naked in a pool and "rebirthed" (I kept my bathing suit on..shy) As I've heard Bryan Kest say...I've been waiting for Kundalini to awaken and shoot up my A#s!

Now I wouldn't take a minute of my questing back. I've had a ball and I love yoga, meditation and playing in the Astral fields, but I want to share with you my realization and it may save you some time and money. Buddha would not share with his disciples what Enlightment was. He would only share with them, what it was not. He did not share what it was because our silly egos would choose to make it some unobtainable thing that only people like Mother Theresa, Jesus (and yes, he was born enlightened) and Gandhi would get to experience. We would decide that we had to be walking that path to obtain it. Well, our egos did that anyway so I will share.

First, Buddha said that Enlightenment is not suffering. Enlightenment is NOT SUFFERING. Enlightenment is simply not suffering. Can you find a moment in your life when you were just happy and floating along? Can you find a moment when everything was just groovy? Your body felt great, you felt vibrant and alive, your mind was happy and you were simply enjoying your existence. A moment. Just one. I know you can find one and probably many. Those were moments of Enlightenment. You already know what it feels like.

When you are not suffering, you are happy. Happy = Enlightenment. Totally obtainable. Already experienced in many moments by the masses. During the Immersion we do a lot of things that work together to facilitate happiness (read enlightenment). We eat better, move more, embrace mindfulness, meditation and quiet. We work on letting go of the past and planning for our future. We cultivate the pure qualities of our soul and move away from the "not so pure" qualities of our ego. Ultimately we embrace our life's purpose and, you guessed it, we get happy. LEARN MORE about the Elemental Immersion.

Talking the talk....walk

Monday night I taught the Immersion at our new Learning Center. My kids tagged along as they sometimes do when I teach in the evenings. We always make a plan at the beginning of class for entertainment and snacking so that they don't interrupt the flow. On Monday, I gave them some cash and told them they could walk around the outside of the building and get a treat after they did their homework. We practiced the walk....good to go. I failed to realize, however, that the doors to the building would lock behind them. They headed out and when they came back, they couldn't get in. I had turned my phone to silent to teach and in a panic (instead of knocking...I was seated literally 20 feet from the door) the kids called their dad...the ex. (yea, I got one of those too.)


He told them to knock. They knocked as if a mass murderer was behind them. Answering the door, I realized they were on the phone with their dad...the ex...and my immediate thought was, "oh boy...here we go...I'm in trouble now". My phone on silent, I knew the nasty-text messages were piling up. After class, I checked my phone. Nothing. Not a single message. Later that night I got a message simply saying to please not let the kids wander strange buildings on their own. I paused and thought that that was probably a good idea.


And then it struck me...


I'm not talking the talk, I'm walking the walk and it's EASY!


In yoga, I frequently speak about how you can only change yourself. You can't change other people. I talk about how the people in your life will shift as you shift. I tell my yogis to be patient. This shifting simply happens. It takes time. It never fails that someone will bring up the fact that they have a terrible relationship with an ex or with a relative and it is driving them to insanity. It pushes all of their buttons and they can't disengage. They are stuck in an exchange of hostility and bitterness. I always tell them to simply start serving the other person. It's called Karma yoga. Just find a way to meet the persons needs. Don't respond to the violence. Disengage, serve and meet them with understanding and compassion.


This is a practice. Just do it. It's hard. It's painful and then it's easy. I usually then go on to tell everyone that they are learning amazing skills of yoga which will help them change themselves. They are becoming more compassionate and understanding. They are learning skills that others do not possess and therefore they have a higher responsibility to set an example and to "be the change." I'm sure it sounds like "blah blah blah" by the end of my speech.


To be honest, it sounds like "blah blah blah" to me too. You see, I also have an ex. I also have some people in my life who are difficult. I still practice Karma Yoga though because I believe in yoga and I know that a shift will occur if I simply practice. I know this in my heart, but I've been doing this for a long time waiting for this shifting.


I locked my kids out of an office building in the dark. They called their dad who was 30 minutes away. They were panicked. He simply told them to knock. I received a gentle reminder one hour later that it probably wasn't a great idea to let your kids roam around unfamiliar buildings at night. I paused and thought, that's a good idea. No drama.


This S#*t totally works!

Kundalini Energy

The purpose of yoga is to line up your subtle energy channels and awaken the Kundalini or Spiritual Energy that lives coiled up at the base of your spine. We do this with breath, movement, intent and meditation.

These energy channels are known as Chakras. Chakra is a Sanskrit word that translates to our English word "wheel". You can envision these Chakras as spinning wheels strategically placed along your spine. Interestingly, they are located on each of your endocrine glands. There are seven main chakras and hundreds of others.

The root chakra is located at the base of your spine. The color is red. This is where your day to day activities live. It is linked to your adrenal glands. This is where your karma lives. When this chakra is open you feel connected to earth. You make good choices to nourish your body.

The sacral chakra is located just below your belly button. The color is orange. It is linked to the gonads and reproductive system. This is where your creativity and sexual energy lives. When this chakra is open you feel spontaneaous and joyful.

The solar chakra is located just above your belly button. The color is yellow. It is linked to your pancreas. This is where your willpower lives. This is where we plant the seeds of our intentions and desires. When this chakra is open you feel powerful and able to manifest anything you want.

The heart chakra is located on your heart. The color is green. It is linked to your thymus. This is where you give and receive love. In yoga, if your heart chakra opens, all the other chakras will open. The heart chakra is where your spiritual energy connects to your earthly energy. When this chakra is open you understand universal love. You give and receive freely.

The throat chakra is located at your throat. The color is sky blue. It is linked to your thyroid gland. This is where your truth lives. The voice that strongly guides you to make good choices for yourself lives there. When this chakra is open, you are able to tell truth from nontruth. You speak your truth with kindness.

The Third Eye is located just between and above your eyes. The color is indigo. It is linked to your Pituitary Gland. This is where your intuition lives. This chakra gives you a sense of knowingness and connection with your soul. When this chakra is open you have a sense of yourself as an enormous expansive creature that is connected to all things.

Finally, the Crown Chakra is located just above the crown of your head. The color is white or gold. It is linked to your Pineal Gland. This is your direct connection to spirit. When this chakra is open you feel the presense of spirit within and without you in every moment of every day.

The Kundalini energy is represented as a snake coiled up three and one half times in your root chakra. It can awaken gently over time with yoga or it can awaken suddenly on its own. A sudden awakening frequently manifests as severe back pain, but other symptoms may appear as well. When this energy awakens, you begin your spiritual journey back to your true self.

As you practice yoga, envision this rainbow of energy flowing up and down your spine. Imagine that it is connecting and releasing at the same time. Imagine that it is healing you on all levels.