So I’m sitting in week 2 of editing the ‘sales pitch’ for the Elemental Cleanse which is to go online to the entire nation in a few short months. This should have been an easy one hour project. It hasn’t been. If you took a look at what I’ve done in 2 weeks working diligently on this, you would laugh.
You see, I stink at selling stuff. I don’t care about it. I think to myself that if someone were to simply read the testimonials and see that participants are losing 6 – 12 pounds in 28 days, that they are reinventing their lives, that they are reconnecting with their loved ones, that they are manifesting jobs, homes and love that that oughta do it. What more can I add, seriously?
I hate money back guarantees. I always think companies and people are full of it when they offer a money back guarantee especially on something that is anecdotally supported as its evidence. You know what? I’m happy to give you your money back no matter what because I don’t want your money if you are unhappy. That’s bad Karma. How’s that for a money back guarantee?
I don’t like “buy one and get one free”. It must suck if they have to give away the second one or clearly the first one is overpriced. The Elemental Cleanse is dirt cheap. For $179 (in person cleanse) you get 4 hours of yoga, 8 hours of lecture and a cleansing kit valued at $55. I’ve created two entire studios for you to practice yoga in to support you during the cleanse. In Montgomery, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday night are all designed to support your cleanse! You have total access to me. I talk to you on the phone, I email, I blog and I do tons of research for you every time you even have an odd question like…”do microwaves change the nuclear photon protoplastic structure of food?” (seriously, they don’t).
How can I get you to participate in the cleanse? I have no idea. The problem for me is that you have to want to change your life. You have to have reached a point where you have tried the fad diets and failed, you have tried to have a tangible experience of God and failed, you are stressed, tired, lacking joy and honest to God…..your waking thought….is….”This can’t be all there is”. At that point, you will be happy to pay me $179 to teach you the skills you need to become your own master.
At the end of 28 days, you will come up to me and explain to me that I should charge more. Please God….you words….my mouth….help.
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