Problems

My little pond in my backyard is truly my sanctuary. I sit by it every morning and enjoy my coffee watching the fish and frogs and not thinking. In those moments of non-thought, I arrive at the most inspiring places. I crave and need my pond.

My pond broke. The little fountain stopped splashing and the ceramic frog started sputtering water. I sat with it for a few days willing it to fix itself, but came to conclude that the magical pond fairies would not be taking care of this one. I tackled the task of the cleaning the filter. No good. Clearly I needed a new pump. Now keep in mind, I did not install this pond myself. I know nothing of pond care or maintenance. Plumbing, however, cannot be that hard to figure out. It’s just a bunch of tubes.

New pump in hand, yoga pants rolled up, I dive in. The fish are not afraid of me. They spend the entire time nipping at my ankles. Midway through, my daughter craves a waterfall. It can’t be that hard. I reroute water flow from sputtering frog and gather huge quartz crystals I’ve accumulated. Instant waterfall.

Sitting back, covered in mud, soaking wet, deep gash in thumb from a rough cut quartz, I am pleased. I am also proud of myself. My personal mantra is “I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t fix”. I tell this to friends and kids and especially to myself. Some days I doubt my mantra and sit by my problems hoping magical fairies will fix them. I always end up diving in and fixing the problem myself.

Don’t ignore life’s issues. You were born with all the knowledge and power you will ever need to fix life’s problems. When faced with any challenge, look at it as an opportunity to learn. Rerouting one’s thoughts or heart is just like rerouting a sputtering ceramic frog and turning it into a magical crystal waterfall.

tilting...

I firmly believe that everyone should get up in the morning and sit quietly for 10 minutes minimum. You don't have to meditate....unless you want. Just sit quietly and enjoy nature. If the whole world participated in this "gift to self", I believe we would have world peace. I didn't get to sit by my pond today. I got up and hit my mac and got sucked into twitter, facebook, blogspot, marketing, emailing, accounting and writing newsletters. These are all things you must do nowadays to run a successful business. The good news is that I love all this stuff. The bad news is is that it is easy to get sucked in and not take those precious moments.

I haven't missed a day by my pond since I put it in. I could hear it out the window, but it wasn't the same. I willed myself to move to the pond and work, but I couldn't move. I miss that body of water. I went to the studio and filled up the sink and splashed around a little. It just didn't have the same soothing effect as being under a gorgeous honey locust and smelling my neighbor flowers and listening to that perfect splash of the fountain. ahhhh

In yoga I couldn't balance. I kept falling over. The world was tilting. This is very embarrassing for a yoga instructor even if we believe we have overcome our ego. The students look at you and think..."gosh, she sucks".

I'm going to go for a walk on the bike trail by the Little Miami River today. I'm going to throw some rocks and stick my feet in. My work can wait because my innerwork cannot. Take time for yourself daily. Find your silent self and connect. Balance.

responding

I received a very irate text message this morning. Irate is probably too nice of a word. It was sent with much malice. Apparently, I inverted my babysitter's phone number and have been texting an 87 year old man. He doesn't know how to text and it is driving him crazy. I'm assuming his daughter came to check on him this morning and he let her her have it.

My body responded with a flush of anger. I thought "How rude...obviously this is a mistake. Why would they be so rude?" I paused. I took a deep breath. I thought about this poor man who was probably given the cell phone by his daughter so he would always have help nearby. I thought about how overwhelming technology is to older people. I thought about the daughter who is probably stressed taking care of an aging parent. I thought about the text reminder beebing all night and probably keeping him from much needed rest.

I replied honestly, with a heartfelt apology and went back to my make-up. Some time passed and my phone beeped. The reply was "Thank you. That was very nice of you." In those moments when I paused and thought about what someone else was experiencing, I changed the situation and I probably changed her day and her thoughts about humanity, if only for a moment.

Always pause and consider what the other person is going through. It's okay to feel angry, but before you react give yourself time to respond instead. Take time to be compassionate, kind and understanding even when someone is nasty, rude or mean to you.

Philosophy in Progress....Number 1

Principles to live by as decoded by Pamela Quinn.....normal average human on a journey.

Disclaimer: "I have personally tested all of my philosophies through years of research and living. They totally work without exception...for me. I highly recommend that you "fake it until you make it" until you develop your own personal philosophies. In the meantime, these do work and I give them to you to use freely and share with others."

Principle of achieving a life of happiness and purpose #1 (this title may change)

Give Thanks.

Okay, this is not a cop out. It really really works. (I know every spiritual book on the planet includes this step but I have actually tested it and proven it so it is not theoretical garbage). When you get up in the morning, give thanks for everything in your life. Give thanks for all the good stuff and the bad stuff too. Know that when bad things are happening it is simply the universe giving you a tiny nudge or a big huge push to choose a different path and make different choices. It is an opportunity to grow. Repeat this step nightly before bed.

True Love

I signed up on myspace. I'm also on facebook, linked in and all the other various forms of social media marketing. It's a "must" nowadays if you have a business or are in the business of selling. I'm still trying to figure out why it is a must, but I love my computer and writing so I'm in.

It's really fun. You get lots of interesting questions from all over the world. There is a boy from Africa who is a pen pal and a friend from S. Dakota. Ex-boyfriends keep in touch and people I went to school with find me. I love hearing about their lives.

Oddly, myspace is a little different. There are lots of requests for romance with long paragraphs on what the person is looking for in a partner. Many are looking for fun. Most are looking for love. I recently read that one in eight marriages are now started as on-line romances.

When I think of love and being in a committed relationship, I always go back to That Nich Hahn's beautiful book called "True Love". That Nich Hahn is a Zen Buddhist Monk. He writes beautifully and simply. In this book are the mantras for true love that I share with you now.

HOW TO LOVE:

1. Be there: Ask yourself, do I have time to love? Each day a little bit of time should be spent loving. Say to the person “I am here for you”

2. Recognize the presence of another.
Say to the person “I know that you are here and it makes me very happy.”

3. Be there when someone is suffering.
Say to the person, “I know that you are suffering and I am here for you.”

4. Overcoming pride.
Say to the person “I am suffering and I need your help”

Making this your daily practice enhances the experience of love. It honors the other person and they in turn honor you. It is magical and totally works. I practice this with my children and someday I will practice with my "true love". Good luck friends.

Insanity

I'm sailing a ship of insanity floating in a sea of tranquility. Come join me.

I'm slowly losing my mind. The more and more grounded, centered and clear I become, the more I simply float away. I find my days full of peace and dreaminess. Problems dissolve and solve themselves. I have time for everything and a wonderful kind of peace.

I am surrounded by the rest of the world which doesn't seem so peaceful and easy. People that talk too much and don't listen. People that are hostile and negative. I find that I don't want to be around them. I grow tired quickly in their presence. I'd rather sit quietly alone. I could become the hermit and live quite happily.

I'm sure I appear spaced out and disinterested as I engage in my daily activities and honestly I am. I can't stand exchanging pleasantries. It bores me. I just really want to know what is going on with you. What are you working on and how are you changing your life? Why do you stay with him or not quit that job? Why aren't you living with passion? I crave newness.

I feel time ticking away and I am driven to solve and help. I feel the intense drive to initiate change and I can't stand to see you stuck. Move.

Oddly, sitting still is the best way to move. Namaste

(I am reading Oriah's new book, "The Invitation". Chapter 1 gave me some weird permission to think these thoughts freely. Her passion and desperation for connection and change resonate with me.)

The Invitation

I first heard this poem entering a Shavasana. I didn't even realize it was a book until it literally fell off the shelf into my hands over the weekend. I haven't gotten past the poem, but I already know I will love the book. The author is Oriah and the book is called "The Invitation".

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, ifyou have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with the wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself; if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you cam to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

- Oriah.

Read the book with me. It's beautiful.

Namaste.